The Secret Society

For decades, the idea of secrecy has plagued the Gay community at large. Although the idea of secrecy is not inclusive to just minorities who are gay, I have found it to be the most prominent for gay minorities, in particular, Blacks and Latinos.

Back in the 50's and 60's- the Gay community began to form underground communities in bars and other nightclubs, and while they were doing it way before then, it wasn't until the Stonewall Riot that the "Above Ground Underground" became the center of the issues for gays, and the need for liberation arose. After the riot, and the days that followed it, many felt the urge to be open, and those who would have been hiding behind closed doors, suddenly realized they needed to join the movement. [please google Stonewall Riot of 1969 for background information]

Yet, 41 years later and many gay Americans are still living in "The Secret Society"--the idea that they must stay underground and not speak openly about who they are. Now while I believe everyone has their right to privacy and may decide not to share it with the entire world, I think there is a serious issue when it becomes the "down low" situation.

According to About.com, the "down low" refers to men who discreetly have sex with other men while in sexual relationships with women are said to be on the "down low" (or "DL" for short). Yet, I believe that the "DL" can also refer to men who may be single, and may be seeking relationships with women, while still seeking sexual fulfillment from other men. While this issue has been covered by mass media and social media as an issue affecting African-Americans, it is also affecting other minorities within the gay community.

I believe that cultural influences and expectations give way for many to be on the down low, or in hiding, only adding to the pressure of the secret society. While many gay Americans are fighting for equality and justice, we are forgetting about one of the biggest issue that affects our community--secrecy. We have a responsibility to ourselves, to others like us, and to heterosexuals to educate and promote acceptance, especially among the African-Americans and Hispanic groups.

Personally, one major problem I have with men who are on the "down low" or in hiding, is that they allow people like me, minorities, who were brave enough to be open, to take all of the heat. Could you imagine the impact that a man, who is part of one of the major Black Fraternities in the country, could have if he was open about his interest in men? [referring to an individual I came across last night]. Or just the simple fact that more and more Black and Latino men are willing to stand up and speak out, because there is strength in numbers. No longer will I or anyone like me, have to be the sole target, and who would target a big group without meeting resistance?

In addition, I think of the women, those who have no idea what is going on behind closed doors, in the Internet browser history, and secret messages. Part of me feels bad for them, and another part of me feels angry because these men are playing with people's emotions- which will always end badly.

All of this is occurring because we've built a secret society, the idea that we can not be open and honest is a shadow, hovering over everyone. How can any real equality come, when far too many of us, rather pass [refers to a man who many would consider to be straight, and never think that they were gay] then be honest, whether out of fear or uncertainty?

My biggest hope is that this society that many of us have contribute to, crumbles and that from the debris--rises a new generation of freed people, of people that can be honest with themselves and others around them without fear of repression, isolation or harm.