Breathe Again

Note to the readers:
I have not written a blog in a long time, maybe that is because of my busy schedule or because I have lost touch with the writer within me. Whatever the case may be I decided that this summer I would make it my mission to blog once a day (when time permits).



Have you ever had that moment, when your lungs ceased from working and everything around you seemed to be closing in on you? Call it a panic attack, or a vivid imagination but sometimes life has a way of stopping you from breathing. Of course, it isn’t long enough to kill you, but long enough to make you realize that something is wrong.

For the past few weeks I felt as if I could not breathe. I felt as if life was closing in on me and I had nowhere to go. Trapped. However, I am finally able to breathe again because I am no longer allowing life to dictate how I feel or how I cope. Life happens, this we all know is true. Sometimes the challenges are minor and easily overcame, and other times, the challenges are greater and require a greater strength. But when you feel like you are suffocating, what do you do? What does anyone do in that situation?

I learned that it is easier to cry, get angry, forget eating diet plans, and sleep in bed and when all of that fails, I bury myself in my work. Coping is such a personal process, whether you are coping with death, a failed relationship or personal struggles.

“All I have, all I need, he's the air I would kill to breathe
Holds my love in his hands, still I'm searching for something
Out of breath, I am left hoping someday I'll breathe again
I'll breathe again “—Sara Bareilles

After a recent break-up, I was really a hot mess. I was drinking by myself and still kind of shocked on how everything went down. While I won’t get into the details, to spare my friend’s feelings, it was an eye-opener. Although our romantic relationship didn’t last, I can honestly say I’ve found a great friendship with him. Although he is not perfect, and there are some things he needs to deal with, I realized that every one that has entered or left my life has done so for a greater reason then I will ever realize. So dealing with the break-up, and all of the insecurities that came with it, I realized I had stopped breathing for a while. That was easy for me to do, I retreated to what I know best: my work.

However, coping with life’s ups and downs is not simple and it is always a process. Sometimes you have to cry, and other times you have to pull yourself up, wipe your face and move on. The process is not as simple as I am writing it to be however I know that the process is one that we must all endure and go through at least once or twice in our lifetime. Whether it is dealing with the death of a love one or dealing with a failed relationship it needs to be done. Don’t turn to vices, or abusive behavior, take the time to really cope and grow from the experience.

I have begun to breathe again and in that process I have found a greater sense of self-awareness and appreciation for all that I have. As the air begins to fill my lungs, and I exhale, I can say that I am a better person at the end of it all and no matter where life takes me next; I know I will breathe again.